Well Said

- Jenny: Honey, I think I have to quit my job.
- John: You don't have to do that.We can get some help
- Jenny: I don't want any help.I really don't. I just don't - Will you hand me
that pacifier?
- John: Yeah.
- Jenny: I just- I don't want to be one of those people...
that sees their child for an hour at night.I don't.
- John: I know, but you love your work and ..
- Jenny: I love my work, honey. But this is killing me.
When I'm at the office, I just wanna be here.
And when I'm here, I am constantly thinking about work.
And I just know that I'm doing both jobs half- halfway.
- John: Well, you're not doing them halfway.
- Jenny: If I have to give up something... I do not .. I do not 
want to give up this.

Lines above are from the movie "Marley and Me", starring Owen Welson
and Jennifer Aniston. It is an easy movie which you would watch by 
accident on a boring afternoon you spent moving between TV channels
looking desperately for something meaningful to watch.
Although the movie main plot is about a family's dog and how it 
is a real partner through out the journey,the movie comes across
some sensitive and real human struggles.

Screenplay writers ... you did a great job, this is well said
and exactly how I feel!

Don’t Ever Say Never

Sameh once told me “Don’t Ever Say Never”.

Sameh was my manager in a very junior PR job I handled throughout the year 2001,  he was a cool guy 10 years older and he liked to preach a lot.  Sameh used to make fun of me frequently, while he grabs himself to the office balcony saying sarcastically  “ta3aly asharabek sagayer” – let me grant your first smoke. Being the cute girly figure I was, I always replied with a chock on face “Sagayer !! I would never smoke” ! and I said this not out of health concerns but out of a conservative background that I come from which doesn’t favor females smoking.

Sameh laughed and advised me “Don’t ever say Never .. you don’t know how things might change”. Back then, I insisted that I am up to things I promise … Now I declare , “Sameh you WiN!” Not that I am smoking now, I still don’t and currently based on strong beliefs, but I discovered am not up to promises the way I thought.

As a productive human and a typical hard worker, Work  used to be my first priority. I was a career oriented woman, one that believed a woman should have a strong role outside home. I thought Women can fit easily in any job and nothing would limit their capabilities. I admit that I kinda underestimated house wives and appreciated working women more. I decided kids should not be allowed to ruin their mothers futures, baby could be sent to day care or left with a relative once he is 3 months old. Kids also should not invade parents relationships and love towards them should not exceed existing loves. I always wondered how mothers are that giving, forgiving and accepting, I knew deep inside I will not be that good and was sure my babies would love their daddy more. Oh, How weird I was .

Since I delivered, or maybe since I got pregnant, I began feeling the change. Gradually priorities are reordered and work dropped somewhere down.  Until finally I am every person I used to say I would never be. I become that family oriented kind hearted mother, who loves her baby more than anyone else. A person with near tears that would cry watching a movie patronizing a dieing dog. One with a mellow heart which is acquired with a smile and wiped with a teddy hug. I am no more offended of puke, poop, and drool.

As Sameh once told me, you never know how things might change. I add, you also never know how YOU might change! without planning or anticipating, We Do Change.

Moral of the story .. don’t ever say never!

Tips on using this blog

I tend to start projects and never finish them. If you know me personally, you most probably know about  the newspaper I initiated with some friends and how I want to quit now, or about the book I started and never finished writing till now, also my masters plans and the scenario writing workshops, photography classes, learning cooking  ,and much much more. Even these two blogs i-buzz and i-review I started last year are great witnesses on failures to meet my new year resolutions.

Any how .. I am stating the lines above to remind myself that this blog shouldn’t face the same fate of my other projects. I need to work on this blog because I have been fantasizing about  it since pregnancy and the early days after delivery .. going through all these new feelings and the mini struggles and knowing someone else might be facing the  same situation some other place in the world, Simply made me feel I need to share this!

So, if you ever ran across this blog, I shall highlight the following for you:

1. I am not sure if I will continue writing this blog in English. I always wanted to write in English to enhance my writing skills but I still find it easier to express in Arabic and that’s why I dropped many of my earlier projects. So, I will give it a shot but I might switch to Arabic at any moment, frankly I also feel there is a lack of similar resources in Arabic so it is still worth an Arabic version. Will see about this!

2. This is not the final theme or colors, it is just a start for the kick off and I will be working on it On the Go.

3. I didn’t master  word press blogging world yet, so you will a lot of unfinished details, broken links, and undone side bars. Bare with me until I master it and this blog shall rock – I am sure 😉

That’s all I guess for now … I will add more tips if I remembered anymore.

I am No Super Mama .. The Start

I am currently living a life that I didnt know before! I don’t remember that I ever stayed home more than 2 weeks since I graduated and started my career life, but now I am staying home for more than two months. That’s because new things happen and they force us to accept – happily or not – fatal changes in our lives.

I am currently leading a different life style!I don’t recall I ever had something in my life that doesn’t fall within my personal concerns. I always had things done my way and according to my needs.  But now, it has been long since I read a page, worked, wrote, went to theaters, checked my favorite websites, listened to beloved music, or even watched fafafeat the culinary TV channel. Again, that’s because new things happen and we allow them – happily or not – to transform us into new persons.

I am a new mother .. for two months and one week now .. and I admit it is like living my life from a new side! A side that I never knew about .. never knew it existed.

A friend previously told me that she once read that “having kinds is like having a tattoo on your face, you have to be sure you really wan’t it .. take care you can’t remove it”. Another friend told me  that motherhood is the most overwhelming experience, she described it  as a roller coaster ride . Knowing all of this, I still took the decision and became the mother of the lovely baby boy “Selim”.

About the new life am living, the tattoo I have now on my face, and the roller coaster ride I am unable to leave, I am starting this blog.